Lost inside this shadow’s web,
I feel the season’s rise and ebb.
The sun’s sweet and gentle rise,
Followed by its fast demise,
Marks the flow of days gone by.
While the small speck of I
Waits for dawn to come once more
Each day brings me nearer to your door.
You take me in you sure arms,
Blocking in all your warm.
The world around me disappears,
My doubts, my loss, my hate, my fears.
All that remains is this sweet abode,
Where it seems no one gets old
The place where one can be one’s own
The place that saves, the place called home.

I hear your voice,
Filtering through the speakers
Far away, feeling that you're near.

I made a choice,
Starring at my sneakers,
Defeated not by you, but by fear.

Time has passed,
I've tried to let you go,
But somehow I just can't forget.

Nothing lasts,
This, of course I know,
But,
You'll never know, you are my greatest regret.

The Soldier of the Front Line

Searching, watching, waiting.
The soldier on the front line.
Broken and beaten down.
Torn at the seams,
Leaking all that was once joyous.
Hope pouring from gaping wounds
As the skin becomes so thick that arrows can not bend it.
The broken-doll limbs hold bodies above the mud:
Sinking, sinking, sinking,
Sunk.
Drowning in the apparitions of life dancing,
Whirling,
Gracefully swirling in the empty air.
Alone, wanting, needing, despairing.
The soldier on the front line.
All is nothing, and nothing is lost.
Life beats for no one, and life is broken-doll love.
Fighting the battles for sanity, for long forgotten dreams.
Searching, watching, waiting.
No one is coming.
Nothing to defend against.
Forever standing, forever failing.
The soldier of the front line.
Forever.

Sitting on a couch,
Wrapped in my arms
And a faded flannel blanket
I push away the grey with thoughts of you.

Staring in a pouch,
Dreaming of the stars,
Picking planets for my basket
Any little fantasy of we will do.

The clock clicks time,
My eyes close and open,
I watch the world twirl in bliss
And I play with the end of my hair.

I listen to life’s chimes,
No patience for hope,
I have a last minute wish And a last second prayer.

Smile for me
Make me feel safe
Make me feel warm

Cry for me
Make me feel sorrow
Make me feel pain

Laugh for me
Make me feel joy
Make me feel love

Scream for me
Make me feel fear
Make me feel rage

Live for me
So I can feel nothing

Your mouth's caress upon my breast
You rip my clothes and tear my flesh.
Beating out a rhythm with your hips
You explore my body with you lips.

My arching back, in pleasure, in pain;
You hollow cries forget my name.

Breath intertwined, bodies exhaled.
I rest with you and I am impaled.
Shivering in heat, sweating in cold,
Lost within your desperate hold.

Hiding from glory, and basking in shame;
Your hollow cries forget my name.

My fingernails scratch your skin
And my body draws you deeper in.
You pull my hair and bite my neck
Until you sleep beneath my flesh.

Your crawling deep within my veins;
Your hollow cries forget my name.

Pull me in and deeper down
Tightly grip this morbid clown
Taste the tears caught by my frown
Dance in the stars trapped in my gown

Find me in the maze of my mind
Seek that which I could not find
Shoot the stag, release the hind
Break these cords that tear and bind

Bring down the walls I could not scale
Rip at the earth with my brittle nails
Feel fear rush in as if impaled
Here shame enters only to fail

See me stand alone and frail
With no other likened to my kind
Look into me, be me, and drown